Pee

“My favorite!”
~ R. Kelly

What appears to be a sample of pee is actually just a glass of apple juice.

Over millenia, the human body has been one of the most intriguing and enigmatic mechanisms found in nature. It is constanly asking its user to feed it and nurture it, and yet, about a few seconds the body has absorbed the nutrients, it will instantly deplete the remaining food and ask for more. There are two ways this depletion is done: solid and liquid. This article will focus on the latter.

Several names have been given to this strange liquid substance: urine, emiction, piss, tinkle, golden shower, weewee... However, for the sake of brevity and commodity, in this article it will be denominated using the short abrevation pee.

Description[edit | edit source]

Pee is a viscous liquid colored by a golden taint. Its taste is unknown as the human population mostly rejects the idea of drinkining this substance; however, several reports documment that it can have a bittersweat and somewhat salty taste.

Production[edit | edit source]

Machinery[edit | edit source]

The machinery that produces the pee, or urinary system, differs depending on the sex of the creature that is peeing, in the same way the sexual organs do. Coincidently, these sexual organs just happen to be the same in charge of expulsing pee, which can make things awkard during sexual intercourse if one of the parts involved accidentally leak. It is unknown is this is a mistake in behalf of God's design, or if it's just a result of Him being a mischevious practical joker.

In males

A male penis, drowned in its own pee.

In males, the organ in charge of expulsing pee is the penis.

In females

In females, the organ in charge of expulsing pee is the vulva.

Phases of pee[edit | edit source]

In the average animal,

Step 1 - The urge When the human body starts producing pee, its human starts feeling a sting in their groin. It doesn't matter if they're sleeping, working, or doing other things; when the pee needs to be expulsed, it will not hestitate to make itself noticed.

Step 2 - The search Humans can't simply start peeing in the middle of what they're doing, like other animals do. They have to find a specific spot in buildings, known as a bathroom, where a machine specialized in the storing of pee is found -the toilet. If the human in question fails to find a toilet before pee starts leaking from their penis/vulva, the pee will be instead stored in their pants, becoming the laughing stock of the surronding humans.

Step 3 - The relief In the other hand, if the human succesfully finds a toilet within enough time, they can freely let the pee leave their body, often followed by a sense of pleasure. The amount of pleasure felt during this phase is directly proportional to the amount of time that the previous phase -the search for a bathroom- has lasted.

Use[edit | edit source]

Because of its disgusting appearance and intoxicating odor, humans have failed to give a proper use to this liquid, which . However, several have tried to use it as a drink,

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