User:Kajematch

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Kajematch
Scientific classification
KingdomOrthedontal
PhylumChewy
ClassTeal Mage
OrderOrder of the Iron Tree
FamilyMine
GenusMatch
SpeciesCage
Binomial name
Ladderus Matchus
Specifications
Primary armamentTwinlinked Lascannon
Secondary armamentStormbolter
Power supplyDuck Moisture
Health400
Mana30
Strength12
Intelligence5
Weight8
Length3
Special attackFinal Slash
Conservation status
1 in Existence

“I'm Old Gregg.”

~ Old Gregg on Kajematch

“400 babies!!!!!”

~ Powerthirst testimonial giver on lack of relevance to article

Kajematch is an Uncyclopedia member with minimal humorous contribution or necessary membership. He was born in some really poor place and by freak coincidence found an internet. This internet gave him the ability to shoot people and slay orcs and watch people do burnouts, things otherwise impossible in the real world. He now seeks to edit the Uncyclopedia in an attempt of what he calls "humour". With any luck he'll come up with something good for his userpage.

Early life[edit | edit source]

Kajematch was born in the year 3074 of the third age of Middle Earth. His childhood friends constantly tried to convince him they were Saiyans and had snake DNA and shit like that. This lead Kajematch to believe that the sun isn't a planet and that Elvis is dead. He is so wrong.


Skills and abilities[edit | edit source]

Being a Kaje (cage), and thus being made of metal, the Kajematch can be smelted, forged, welded and broken by Kung Fu masters. Kajematch can also contain prisoners, animals, midgets and xylophones, storing them for the winter.


Possible relation to Johnny Cage and that Kage guy from Virtua Fighter[edit | edit source]

Nah.




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