Portal:Literature

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The Literature Portal

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As the generally accepted definition of literature today hugs folktales to its warm bosom, we might well conclude that literature began with one frightened caveman grunting (see language) his fears to his fellows by firelight. This, however, would be wrong. Scurrying, short and bitter academics in dank bare cells have clinically proven that 'literature' is caused by writing down things which never happened and which afflict the reader with acute boredom , in some cases literally boring the victim to death.

Today, the study of literature remains a major academic discipline at nearly every educational institution around the world, often being the most heavily required class for graduation. This is because academics have declared that finding themes (which the author totally intended to put in the work) is far more important than learning first aid, basic home and auto repair, or how to do your taxes. However, there is one major benefit to the study of literature: without it, as many as half of the jokes in your favorite TV shows would fly right over your head. (Full article...)


Why is book? Because book good. If you don't book, you won't good. Book make you good at yes. Grammar make good writing. Write is good so you can make more book. Book good. Make others read book. Book make good write at book. I rest my case. (Full article...)

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Highlighted Articles

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Is this pointless?

As with almost all paradoxes (paradoxii?) the Pointless Paradox is an apparently true statement or group of statements that leads to a contradiction or a situation which defies intuition or logic. In the case of the Pointless Paradox this is doubly so, making this a paradox within a paradox. Why I'm wasting my time telling you this I just don't know, nor do I care. See Nobody cares for more information.

Some of the greatest minds in history, from Immanuel Kant to Bertrand Russell to James Bond have attempted to resolve this paradox with no success. Indeed, Russell referred to it as "'the motherbitch of all paradoxes'".

The pointless paradox debate has been running for centuries and centres on a discussion between Man and the paradox itself. It goes something like this:

…
Archive Article credit: MrN9000 (more…)



Come across a decent article on literature? Well, make sure you wipe it clean, pervert. Then submit it for promotion.

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Literary News

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"Holy shit, an UnNews reporter and comedic god actually watched my piss poor excuse for a show?..."

NEW YORK CITY, New York -- Jon Stewart, comedian news reporter for the Daily Show, has apparently plagiarized an UnNews column wrote on the 14th of June, titled UnNews:Obama rewards terrorists. Stewart's piece, titled "Guantanamo Baywatch - Uighur, Please", was a thinly veiled remake of the article already appearing on the awarding winning UnNews.

Charges of plagiarism are serious, and outside opinions usually sought, even in obvious cases. New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd was asked for her opinion, she being an expert in plagiarism.…

Archive Article credit: Clemens177 (more...)
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Additional 'Referandom'

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UnBooks:

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UnPoetia:

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UnScripts:

Don't forget to check out the Theatre Portal.
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Highlighted Biography

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Playwright, novelist, musician, poet, philanthropist, historian, short story writer - these are just a few of the professions of individuals that Oscar Wilde has corrupted with his rampant sexuality and Rabelaisian appetites.

A man whose wisdom touches on nearly every conceivable topic, often without consent, which in turn has led to several lawsuits. Renown'd for his beautiful diction and his skilled oratory, Oscar is without doubt one of the leading literary figures of the first few days of March in 1895. (He was in jail in March 1897.)

Oscar Wilde is hailed as one of the most brilliant men who ever existed and ruler of Uncyclopedia without really having done anything to merit this. Just accept it.…

Archive Article credit: Mhaille (more...)
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Highlighted Articles

Artificial Intelligence Can Now Write Poems

I am a coal-truck
by a broken heart
I have no sound
the sound of my heart
I am not

Nominate stuff Image credit: Cédric Spatiotemprel Image archive


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Poem of the Week

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{{{caption}}}

my friend Big Joe and I

walked into a bar

and Joe said

"man, you can't swing a bag of dicks in

here without hitting

some pretentious asshole"


I laughed at his

little jape…

Archive Article credit: HELPME (more…)


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Further Reading

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Oscar Wilde Quote

When one has weighed the sun in the balance, and measured the steps of the moon, and mapped out the seven heavens, there still remains oneself. Who can calculate the orbit of his own soul?'
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