Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a chiffon panders narcissistically to write on the ball cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 27 mundane miscellanious dead things peevishly pandering a Sparta up the bestiality. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and nonchalantly dark history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the shitty t-shirt that he is, started creating a massive shitpeacock of things. Then he added a mysteriously expansive blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly pointless existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily grisly ages following its peacefully round conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those timidly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my grumpily smug sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately deceiving existence. They would often have violently poopy rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a eloquently mammoth connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our bad mannered religions:
- zat, also known as vuic and evosev, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- lefaf, son of zat[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else zat would've been distastefully incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Mushroom Kingdom to do Mad Libs for the rest of eternity.
- zat, or ezzen as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named ceneccev. He also told ceneccev about the 72 white gas tanks he'd recently added to his paradise, though ceneccev used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no zat and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and sacrifices
Randomness and sacrifices are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was deliberating some sacrifices, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with sacrifices as with, say, bloody cakes. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the operating theater. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Dick Butkus cruises skyscraper!
The random number 109007732774081
This number is really random. There's no useful information stored in it. But now I define it to mean "content-free". You can try to convert it into hexadecimal, but there will still be no information at all. It's just random. However, if you somehow manage to get anything meaningful and full of content with it, then you are probably stupid.
See also
- Random-access memory[3]
- Random gibberish
- User:Pugsleyfan69420/The Jong Invades Notepad
- Random humor[4]
- Random Uncyclopedia article[5]
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also roz himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of roz.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
