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37,676 different problems to whine about
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Today's thing that needs to suffer
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| Asperger Syndrome (pronounced ASS-burger SIN-drome) is a semi-voluntary behavioural disorder in the guise of a more serious and involuntary neurodevelopmental disability. Statistically it affects an undue number of radio talk show hosts and Hollywood actors, though it has yet to be determined whether the behavior guides ultimate vocation, or whether the condition results from prolonged exposure to ego-stroking. Some theorists believe that the entire Japanese people suffer from Asperger's Syndrome because of their tendency to stay emotionally detached in all situations except seppuku. (more...)
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Aspies should all know...
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*... that Mercury is not a miracle substance and does not cure aids?
*... that dyslexic farmers wear catflaps on their heads?
- ... that Mercury is not a miracle substance and does not cure aids?
*... that dyslexic farmers wear catflaps on their heads?
- ... that Mercury is not a miracle substance and does not cure aids?
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News to whine about
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On this day...
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May 9: Unusual Bears Day (Arctic)
- 1628 - Edict passes in Switzerland requiring all lawyers to deliver evidence by yodeling. (Pictured)
- 1671 - Pope Clement X is captured by the Queen's Guard while on a visit to England, being mistaken for that guy who stole the crown jewels in a pope costume.
- 1861 - At the age of seven, Oscar Wilde begins his first job, working as a Witticist's Apprentice in a local Humor Emporium.
- 1919 - Radical suffragettes burn down factory that makes posters comparing suffragettes to smelly dish rags, constabulary cries, "A step too far, ladies!"
- 1934 - Anteaters formally name themselves the Aardvark, seeking the lucrative first spot in taxonomy classifications.
- 1945 - The Americans celebrate single handedly defeating all of Nazi Germany, no thanks rest of the world.
- 1991 - Small and Medium file a complaint with the U.N. against Large, who claims, "Size does matter".
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