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Dick Willie Johnson is a legendary human being, with an outrageous amount of accolades under his belt, he is the spokesperson for the universe. Born in New Orleans, Louisiana on October 31, 1895. His first sign of greatness came when he was at the age of 4, he noticed two people strumming on a guitar, curious, Johnson walked up to the men and asked if he could play some. The men allowed him to play, and what followed was the most beautiful music that ever came from a guitar, slapping your grandma with the best fucking riff you've ever heard. After the first riff, the guitar turned into shiny gold. The men were so starstruck they had a heart attack and shortly died. Johnson took the gold guitar with him, the most recognized symbol of Johnson. At the age of 6, Johnson invented the blues music. His first song was called: "Nice Rack (Bitch)". This song soared in popularity and is widely regarded as the greatest song ever made. (Full article...) Recently featured: User:Y UnScripts:Quentin Tarantino's Teletubbies Pikmin Archive · Vote for featured articles · edit Day of which by the is known is the is May 8: National Bad Hair Day (Estonia) 1359 - Pantaloons invented, could dainty wooden clogs be far behind? 1778 - Pampered aristocracy of Western Europe first stitch curly lapdogs to their scalp. (Pictured) 1914 - Errors in year length calculations result in three months of 1913 repeated. 1919 - Warren G. Harding molests his index finger before turning the page. 1924 - Holy 26th Crusade to Monterey, California is unsuccesful because of wrong navigation and ends up in Rio de Janeiro. 1945 - V-E Day, victory in Europe: France unconditionally surrenders to US troops, paving the way for the construction of EuroDisney. 1982 - Abolition of the fixed turnip/gold exchange rate endorsed by American government. 1989 - Bay City Rollers declare: "We're still mad for plaid!"	Prounnounce the English content of which today is by repent The attempts of using the in converse is 2 not. Science the strnght of which. edit In the news D.C. stink-bombed by Jihadists and Nazis Colombia Protests Exclusion from Eurovision; Britney Joins in Support (Pictured) Ship captain who wrecked Baltimore bridge defeated by Upstate New York bridge NFL imposes speed limit and bans trick plays Forecast calls for a leapin' Lousy Smarch weather Larry David gets Hinkled by Anti-Israel Protesters Taylor Swift's favorite NFL team wins rigged Super Bowl, big whoop Elon Musk plants brain chip into first human guinea pig Climate activists ruin Jackson Pollock painting, no one notices Stalemate in Ukraine: Zelenskyy flees for greener pastures Steamboat Willie enters public domain, several Mickey Mouse horror films and games announced Santa's Elves on strike UnNews finally able to write obituaries for Shaft, Bull and Chandler Will Barbenheimer beat JigSaw in his own game? Ongoing: Russian Invasion · Eurovision Recent deaths: Akira Toriyama · M. Emmet Walsh · Louis Gossett Jr. · Hype around the eclipse · O. J. Simpson Upcoming deaths: Kris Kristofferson · Jimmy Carter · Vladimir Putin · The U.S. Federal Budget · Richard Simmons · Kate Middleton · Market demand for White Broncos · God's curse on the Buffalo Bills (..maybe) Of the precise fortune? Questionate Grunt! edit Aknowledge of you... *... that if Mommy is willing to lie about a freaky old dude who sneaks into children's bedrooms in the middle of the night to eat your cookies and drink your milk, she'll no doubt be willing to deceive you about everything else? ... that if Mommy is willing to lie about a freaky old dude who sneaks into children's bedrooms in the middle of the night to eat your cookies and drink your milk, she'll no doubt be willing to deceive you about everything else?
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Manuscript make of person and the and new people which the monthly Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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