Babel:96

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Welcome to TheCoolInternetWebWWWHomepage, the best site on the internet hosted by Geocities.

HIT COUNTER (Powered by AOL) <::::\-/-\-/::::> 26 views since ever.


<MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=SLIDE>Befor u check out my kewl homepage you might wanna read about me or look at photos from my sweet 16 b-day celebration.
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Cant touch this!!!!
Cant touch this</table>!!!!

BREAKING NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!! MY WEBPAGE HAS BEEN REDESIGNED!!!!!

Links | Portals | Portals&nbsp;of&nbsp;links | Creators&nbsp;of&nbsp;portals&nbsp; | <M/ARQUEE> Links&nbsp;to&nbsp;portals&nbsp; | WWW
Funny pictures | Search | Internet Explorer</b>

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My favorite Word document[edit source]


procrastination

MADE WITH FRONT PAGE 95

Now with twice the features!![edit source]

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Tesco, officially the Federal Union of Autonomous Shopping Republics, is a large country that has grown in size since its origin in 1917. It is the largest thing in the world by some considerable distance. It was founded largely on Marxist shopping principles, somewhat of a contradiction you might say, but they sure as hell have found a way! While inside, please refrain from buying Nando’s new Mouth-Roasting-Japan-Hiroshima-Bomb-Devil’s-Blood-Extra-Spicy sauce.

Tesco recruits its staff by loitering outside school gates, waiting for school dropouts. It has a strict policy of not employing anybody with 5 GCSEs or more. If you send them 10 or more CVs they send you a polite letter to tell you to stop sending fucking CVs.

So if you're looking for an exciting, well paid and mentally stimulating career that allows you to express your creativity, get lots of fresh air, make lifelong mates and meet lots of interesting people, then working for Tesco is not for you. (Full article...)

Tell me how good my website is.

The part of my site built with FRONT PAGE!!


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Facts about me[edit source]

  • ... that many children in third world countries don't have enough to eat, but most have access to the Food Network?
  • ... that in Spanish, "¡Chinga tu madre, cabrón!" means "Have a nice day"? Tell your friends!


History Channel[edit source]


Yee-yee ass haircut.

December 9: Belisarius' Hairdo Day (Turkey)

  • 526 - Justinian's favorite general, Belisarius, gets a terrible haircut from a Gothic barber.
  • 1958 - The John Birch Society is founded to fight the perceived threat of certain types of trees.
  • 1967 - Canada invades Greenland, prompting what most historians regard as the most boring war in the history of mankind.
  • 1976 - The CIA fabricates much of the Western United States from Balsa wood and duct tape.

Photos from my 14th birthday

Articles from today's Daily Hostage Negotiator[edit source]



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Those poor bastards.

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 volume 2 and Spaceballs 2 • The Andrew Formerly Known as PrinceRich New Yorkers fleeing MamdanistanLarry Sanger's war on Wikipedia • The New England Patriots barely beating crappy opponents • Mike Tomlin screwing the Pittsburgh SteelersGiants fans hiding in a corner • Bears invading Tennessee

Recent deaths: YouTube player's old design • Nick MangoldJamaicaDonna GodchauxDiane LaddDick Cheney • U.S. Government shutdown (finally!) • Tatsuya NakadaiSally Kirkland • The pennyUdo KierJimmy CliffWarner Bros.

Upcoming deaths: Eurovision Song ContestDEIIran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • MSNBCDonald TrumpNYC's economy • Chiefs Kingdom's and Ravens Flock's livers and kidneys after falling to 6-7Weed67% of people trying to understand why 6 of 7 news stories mention "6-7" • The MetroCard


Their website (Its really good but not as good as mine)

Other cool sites[edit source]


English paper

Write my english paper for me!


Proofreading

I stubbed my toe and it hurts

Sometimes my mom takes Prozac and tries to kill herself



Note to self: remember to put toilet seat down

Seriously id really appreaciate if you wrote my english paper

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David Gerard. What needs to be said about this extraordinary person? He lived life to the fullest. He scaled Everest and swam the Marianas. He piloted a kayak through the rivers of the Yukon with naught but a broken compass to guide him. Now he sits in a nursing home: Alzheimer's has rotted his brain to such an extent that he no longer recognizes himself as the WotM-winning author of Voice Chat, Fountainhead Earth and X Window System.


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If a picture is worth a thousand words, those on Noob of the Month MoneySign's image gallery are good for an average of at least 940 words apiece (he loses points because his Taste picture offends the Greeks). Classic Money highlights include Hazard Dogs and the tuberiffic logo for UnNews, which MS constructed entirely out of string, spittle and beer can tabs.


Congratulations to Rcmurphy, our Uncyclopedian of the Year!


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Past Winners: 2005/2006


WEBRING

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.


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