User:JackOfSpades/WiP/Mitch

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“If you are flammable and have legs you are not blocking a fire exit.”

~ Mitch Hedberg

Mitchell Lee "Mitch" Hedberg PhD (February 24, 1968 – March 30, 2005) was an American philosopher known for his short, sometimes as short as one line, investigations of everyday themes. Dr. Hedberg was never a well-known philosopher in his time, but he developed a cult following due to his short excerpts on life as well has his lovable persona. Sadly, Dr. Hedberg was not meant to philosophize on this world for long as his life was snatched away in 2005 when, after preparing philosophical inquiries for 48 hours straight, he died. Initial reports speculated Mitch's death was suicide or a drug-overdose, but autopsy revealed that Dr. Hedberg had died of surreal-thought poisoning.

Early Life[edit | edit source]

Mitch was born to two average, non-thought provoking people, Arnold and Mary Hedberg. Mitch's capacity for greatness was recognized at an early age when he began coming up with insights on life that were well past his age.

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