Generation Alpha

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Image of a Generation Alpha's heartbeat while watching Skibidi Toilet. Stupidpeopleologists like Dr. Mike Hawk are still trying to figure out why it looks like a stock market chart.
Whoops! Maybe you were looking for 12-year-olds, or Middle schoolers? How about Idiots, or Obesity? Possibly even Babies?

“Did God damn this generation or something? These idiots are beyond down bad.”

~ Doctor Mike Hawk on Gen Alpha
Nutshell.svg This page in a nutshell: Gen Alpha is big, dumb, stupid, and kinda obese.

Generation Alpha, also known as Gen Alpha, is the dumbest generation in centuries. The years that they were, are, and will be born is 2010–2025. The generation itself is infamous for creating useless and dumb slang, whilst being the most down bad generation. It was previously thought this level of dumbass was impossible, but it somehow is. They probably won't get a girlfriend or anything, and eat benadryl for breakfast on top of being lazy as hell.

Shit they'll do[edit | edit source]

  • Consume Tide Pods.
  • Be a furry.
  • Drink boiling water.
  • Sell their lives to China.
  • Be dumb.
  • Watch Skibidi Toilet.
  • Use ChatGPT to do shit for them.
  • Have a horrible sense of humor.

If you come across one of these basically feral creatures, you can avoid becoming stupid as fuck by doing the following:

That last one should be used only if escape is impossible. Please note that these things will usually stay inside, and the risk of your encountering one outside while touching grass is extremely low. If you are to go inside, for example into a Walmart, avoid anyone who appears under the age of twelve, by staying a distance of ten washing machines away.

Description[edit | edit source]

This generation is also among the laziest and thus is projected to be the fattest generations yet. A subset of this generation known as "I-Pad Kids" ranging from two to eight years of age, and are infamous for claiming their (nonexistent) father owns ROBLOX. It is also insanely likely, as suggested by Doctor Mike Hawk, an expert in Stupidpeopleology, that the Generation will fail all grades and will repeat them for at least three years. These dumbasses are addicted to the (claimed-to-be-holy) Skibidi Toilet. The Generation is claimed to be batshit insane by basically everyone else. They are also infamous for being so stupid that they use ChatGPT to do their schoolwork and homework. It is theorized by many parents that they will soon be using the most down bad AI Chatbots to simulate having a girlfriend, of which they will never have because they are eternally doomed by God himself to be a virgin. Going back to the level of dumbass, this is in reference to the stupidity of this Generation. They are so incredibly stupid that they will drink boiling water, eat tide pods, which are poisonous, be a furry, and so many more dumb things. Also, I bet they will be the people to kill off the tradition of No Nut November/NNN.

Trends[edit | edit source]

Something Gen Alpha would laugh at.
Another thing Gen Alpha would laugh at.

Please note that these idiots are mostly present online.

If you encounter any of these trends online, dislike that shit and report the account for dumb.

Predictions[edit | edit source]

Scientifical research has proven that they'll be succeeded by the dreaded Gen Beta, an even dumber generation.